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Foundations of Reflection Self Islamic Marriages Research Paper

Foundations of Reflection: Self Islamic Marriages

Islamic marriages are practices and traditions that usually relate to the nuptial and marriage ceremonies that triumph in the Muslim world. Islamic marriage ceremonies usually vary depending on the country that one lives in and the government regulations that govern them. All together the Muslim men and women are governed by laws that are set by the Quran and are expected to be guided by them.

According to the teachings of the Quran, a Muslim man who is married to a Muslim woman is usually equated to clothing. This is so because the wife and the husband are seen as each other’s comforter and protector, just as garments do not conceal the human body and cover them up, thus they are meant for each other. The Quran continues to explain the teachings and emphasize the matters involving marriages that among the signs that Allah has, is that He created

man and woman well and they will live together in peace and dwell in serenity, and Allah has put love and mercy to their hearts. Marriage in the Muslim culture is usually fundamental because it preserves the Muslim culture and the religion as a whole in the creation of a family. The family that is guided by the principles stipulated in the Quran helps one another to live well, be good people, righteous and competing with each other in doing good deeds.

According to the practices and requirements of the Islamic religion, the most important thing in the marriages is the signing of the marriage contract. The traditions and practices regularly differ according to the cultures that are practiced, adherence of the gender rules and the Islamic faction. Almost all the marriages are not done in the mosque or any religious buildings. The men and women getting married are separated during the reception of the marriage and even the wedding itself. These marriages don’t require any official clergy or a Muslim who understands how to officiate a wedding. If one is having a wedding in the mosque, there are officers who habitually officiate the wedding and are referred to as madhun. They are entrusted with the role of overseeing the marriages.

The marriage contract usually includes a formal statement that specifies the sum of money that the groom should pay to the bride as a form of appreciation to the bride’s family for taking care of the bride for all those years, until she blossomed into a beautiful woman. This money is paid to the family of the bride and according to Islam it’s referred to as Meher. The Meher constitutes of two parts. The first part is the prompt pay that is paid to the bride’s family before the day of the wedding and the second part is paid to the bride’s family throughout her life. Nowadays the groom after presenting the wedding ring to the bride, this is usually seen as the prompt pay while the other pay is paid as he is with his bride ("Mixed Marriages," n.d., p.55). The deferred amount is usually given as a gift or even paid in monetary terms, jewelry or even education if the bride is not yet educated, or if she is educated, she can continue with her studies courtesy of the groom.

The gift is given to the bride and she can use as she pleases without the grooms interference. This is done unless the marriage breaks up before consummation. The Meher is seen in Islam as a guarantee and assurance of security of the bride within the confines of marriage.

The place where the marriage contract is signed is referred to as Nikka ceremony. Here the groom or the representative proposes to the bride with at least two witnesses present. After proposing the groom should mention the details of the Meher. The two couples therefore demonstrate their free will by saying the words ‘I accept’ in Arabic (qabul) three times. The two couples plus their witnesses sign the marriage agreement making the marriage formal and legal according to the religious and the civil laws that guides them. According to Islam the bride and the groom may share a piece of sweet fruit an example is a date. If the couple is separated for the ceremony, a male representative may be called upon to act on behalf of the bride during the nikah. The male representative who represents the bride here is called the wali.

According to the vows and blessings that constitutes the marriage, the man and woman usually recite the first chapter of the holy Quran, called the Fatihah and the blessings normally referred as durud. Most of the Muslims usually leave their representatives to vow and speak about the meaning of the marriages and their responsibilities that are required of them. Nevertheless, some of Muslims recite their vows and do not involve their representatives to speak for them.

There are usually elements that tie the Muslims community together even though some of their weddings vary according to the bride and groom’s culture. Marriage is a life long term commitment to each other with the blessings from Allah.

According to the Islamic religion, the marriage is not restricted exclusively for reproduction nor is it limited to the platonic affiliation between the man and the woman. The term nikah that is referred by the Muslim community means sexual intercourse. The Muslim community have strict rules and guidelines regarding sexual purity. This is because they have understood well that the sexual instincts cannot be or should not be repressed (Baugh, 2011, p87). Sex is only accepted during marriage and is open at that time, before marriage it’s seen as a bad omen and one is not accepted to the community because it’s seen as a taboo. Sex is regulated for the wellbeing of human beings in this life and the success in future.

The holy people of the religion, including the Imams and the prophets of the Islamic religion also give hope to their followers to get married and enjoy the gift of sex in lawful ways. On the issue of celibacy and monasticism, it is forbidden according to the Quran books (Ghori, 2008, p.76). The prophets also discourage this as they teach their followers. This is because it is a sin to Allah and God would not be pleased if they practice such acts. Those who get married are seen as healthy and are remain mentally well. This is because, Islam has maintained that marriages are healthy and are beneficial in many ways, continuity of the generation, companionship, just to mention a few.

Thus marriage is a form of identity as Muslims, it’s a stage of life and a rite of passage through which most men and women of my culture and religion undergo at a certain point in their lives. It encourages upholding of moral values since people are encouraged to be sexually pure and enjoy the gift of sex at the appropriate time. It also differentiates people in terms of where they are in life, for example one is thought to be a complete man or woman once he/she is married.

In conclusion, marriage in our culture shapes who we become later on in life since it is through this institution that we are born and raised, it’s also a way through life lasting bonds are formed and families come up thus making it a fundamental part of our culture. Though the institution of marriage exists in many cultures, it’s unique in ours in our culture and thus one can’t help but be proud to be associated with it.


Baugh, C. (2011). An Exploration of the Juristic Consensus (ijmāʿ) on Compulsion in the Marriages of Minors. CIS, 5(1). doi:10.1558/cis.v5i1.33

Ghori, S. (2008). The application of religious law in North American courts: a case study of_ mutʿa marriages. Journal of Islamic Law and Culture, 10(1), 29-40. doi:10.1080/15288170701878219

Mixed Marriages. (n.d.). The Status of Women under Islamic Law and Modern Islamic Legislation, 84-85. doi:10.1163/ej.9789004172739.i-227.31

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